Day 11 - Paris: Part Deux

Saturday, April 6th 

8:30am

Who wants to see the Louvre?  I certainly did, along with Mrs Meteyard, Ms Doyle and a few other students.  We arrived fairly early which was a bonus considering the line-up was no where to be found and it grew to the length of a 1/4 mile by the time we left.  We really looked forward to this trip.  I sure did because I needed something to get my mind off of the hygienic fouls we noticed yesterday.  Paris didn’t help her cause with a gorgeous scent of garbage as we exited and entered the metro stations.  The site of a fashionably dressed man in his 50s peeing into a tree facing Avenue des Champs-Eylsees was no help either.  

Paris: the one city where a man wearing a peacoat and a burberry scarf can face 100,000 people on the streets as he pees into the wind.

10:00am

We said that witnessing the Mona Lisa together would be good and then we could break off and meet in the centre at 11:30 before we headed out shopping.  Seriously, 90 minutes to take in the culture?  I tried.  I really did, girls, but after heading down one level and seeing another I was called to it like every other scholar of the classics could be.  The way to the Mona Lisa was filled with other paintings and sculptures that depicted the life and death of Jesus Christ.  How many times can one artist show suffering.  I get it.  He died for our sins, and good on him.  Do I have to see it seventeen different ways with 200 different colours and 12 different artists?  I took a picture of the Mona Lisa (which is the fake one for your information) and made a B-line out of Christian Alley to the Roman and Pre-Hellenic periods.  I’d like to thank my professors during my undergrad for allowing me to realise that the education I received will allow me to be a Louvre Guide as a backup to teaching.  Some of the guides got the history of Rome’s first true emperor, Augustus (Octavian), way off.

11:50am

Ok, so I was a little late to the check-in point.  You pass through the sculptures and busts of the early Roman Principate and then your peripherals catch a glimpse of Early Etruscan artifacts.  Your eyes are then able to accurately deduce the location of the Ancient Islamic tablets of script and the origins of the Essenes’ break from Judaism.  I had to hold back my temptations of the level below this exhibit, which led to the pottery and mosaics of Greece circa 12th century B.C.  What I’d give to see something depicting Homer’s Iliad.  

12:30 

We stopped at a pizza restaurant for lunch.  Everyone ordered their own dish in the best way they could.  I’m getting the basics of French back into my system, albeit still not enough to get by on my own.  You know that level between getting by and knowing absolutely nothing?  I’m just on the cusp of becoming good enough to get by.  Directions are a simple knowing of the translation between “left and right” as well as “straight”.  The prepositions like: with, after, for, along and under are making their way from the corner of my primary school brain and out my mouth in what seems to still be a horrible attempt at pronunciation.

Lunch via Group 2

Mr Schneider, Mrs Kelly and Mrs Allingham couldn’t help but treasure the opportunity of having our little darlings try some French cuisine such as escargot and frog legs.  Unfortunately, Kermit was away on holidays and snails were on the menus.  Mrs. Allingham treated the whole group to a bucket of snails for the kids and one glass of champagne for the adults.  Here’s how it went down.

All students had a go at it, with only some nearly forcing it up the other way.  Names have been omitted.  What can be said about his day was that the Clark family now knows what to get Shelly for a birthday dinner.  I don’t know if this a tradition in your family, but my father likes to cook a specific meal for anyone in the family when it’s their birthday.  Shelly, had two helpings of snails and begged for more.

Kym and Kirsty finished a full pizza!  Gemma pawned hers off to me knowing full well that my garbage disposal of a metabolism would take it down.  Pasta and salmon were the choices of others.  The waiter was polite and knew a bit of English too.  Being an Italian restaurant I figured they spoke Italian as well.  The busboy most likely sent a wink as he proclaimed to Kym: 

“Ciao, Bella.”

...

“Sir what’s that mean?”

“Goodbye, beautiful.”

“Awwweee yeah!  Gemma, I just got hit on by the waiter.” 

(High-five handshake to each other)

Well, he was a busboy, Kym, but live your dream.  We broke off once more and did some shopping.  I felt the need to still look for an elusive jacket store or something that could get me out of this old team lacrosse one.  Mrs Meteyard had to find something Luis Vutton and Ms Doyle made a quick move to the GAP with Maddy Lestone.  I didn’t buy anything.  I’m saving up for Turkey.  I think Adrian Wensely, who used to work at Souls, bought a decent leather one there.  I’ll take my chances with the Turks.  

3:30pm

We took the riverboat cruise under the many bridges of city and saw the monuments from different angles.  I have to say I was a bit tired with the whole tourist aspect of the trip.  We have all been on our feet for days on end and I believe some of the students are ready to relax at home.  You can only see the Eiffel Tower so many times before you just want to shut your eyes.  I let the calming voice of our female cruise guide rock me gently to sleep on the final 20 minutes of the voyage.  French is such a beautiful language.

5:00pm

Socks and Undies (as well as other groups) headed back to Notre Dame for some souvenir shopping before heading back to the hostel for tea at 7pm.  On the way back the girls were met with real version of metropolis travel.  

Take:

1 part cramped subway car 

3 parts scared teenager

5 parts seedy looking French dude

1/2 cup of urine soaked homeless man with dog at the stairs

4 cups of valuables and ID cards

Directions:

Shake continuously in a tunnel for 10 stops and 2 transfer stations.

Remember what I told Julian: elbows are your friend.  In a big city you need to get where you want to go.  We have nothing left tonight but to pack and wait for the plane to take us to Istanbul.  When asked about the city there I told the students their guess was as good as mine.  I’ve never been there.  I can tell them it seems to look and act much like Bali when I was there over Christmas in 2011.  Expect a culture shock and the traffic to be as busy as Paris but with more motorbikes.

Conclusion...

If you have 3 days in Europe to kill; you fancy at least one of them in the Louvre; and you enjoy a tacky/romantic photo opportunity then Paris is for you.  Otherwise I suggest you skip it and head to the countryside.  See the true beauty of a place that was once distraught and devastated by war only to become a true gem once again.  Rent a car/motorbike in the summer and look up a relative that you may have lost and pay your respects.  If that isn’t on your bucket list then scratch this city off the map.  That’s my opinion though, and some parents/students will have a different one.

Bring on Istanbul (not Constantinople).  You’ll get that reference after the next post.

Au revoir mes amis!   

Mr Socks

"I'm on a boat!"